The Irrational Behaviors of a Woman Trying To Conceive
I consider myself to be a rational person 99.2% of the time, but eventually irrational thinking always take over when I’m trying to conceive.
My husband and I agreed that we should add another child in our family. I wish it was that easy, talk about it, agree, and then, boom! you got yourself a new baby. Instead, it takes time and planning. I can’t say that it’s all work but it can be stressful.
At first, I try to play it cool. We do our thing, and I just keep my fingers crossed. Then comes the week of my expected visit of Aunt Frankie and that is when I leave reasoning and logic out of the window.
Home pregnancy tests are not safe in my presence. If there is a new stick in that box, I WILL pee on it. I could wait the 4 days for my Aunt to visit, but I to want to know right now. After I have peed on it, I sit and wait for the results.
While I wait, I question myself if this is really what I want. Do I really want to change things? Maybe we should only have one child. When the results are done and negative (as I somehow expected), I then feel disappointed because it was not positive. It didn’t matter if I tried to convince myself that one child was all I needed, deep down I know I want three children.
I’m sure this irrational behavior will continue until there is a positive sign on that test. I’m sure when that happens, I’ll cry like did the first time, all the while saying that it wasn’t supposed to happen (even though we were trying to make it happen).
We women spend a huge chunk of our lives not wanting to get pregnant, and when we are looking to, some of us women (like me) get all crazy about it.
I’m going to play it cool this time. I even hid the pregnancy tests from myself. I’ll only search for it in my cabinet when I really do need it (in 15 days).
Were you behaving irrationally when you were trying to conceive?