Baby Has A Preference
Seven moths ago, my daughter started to change. She’s a toddler, it’s to be expected, what wasn’t expected was the preferences between parents that she has.
A long time ago, or what seemed like a long time ago, I would have precious two minutes here and there, five minutes every now and then, and sometimes, a whole 30 minutes in one chunk–to myself.
Those days are gone. Since I’m home with my daughter 100% of the time, she has preferred my company over my husband’s. So even on the weekends, I’ll still change her, bathe her, and do everything else for her, except feed her. She likes to eat from her dad’s plate, because she could.
My husband tells me that I’m lucky that she wants my company so much, and I of course give him a look that says, “you’ve got to be kidding.”
Stepping in his shoes, I can see what he’s talking about. She seeks me out and wants to hold my hand in the street. No one is allowed to pick her up but me, and because I nurse her, it seems like she’s always hugging me.
From my point of view, I can never get a break (or away long enough), I don’t know how to function when my arms are actually empty–which is rare. I’m tired and exhausted, and my mini breaks are all gone because I’m now on my husband’s diaper change shift on the weekends.
Right now it just seems hard because there is no balance to it all, but I’m sure if there was an arrangement where everything would be slightly different, it would make a big difference.
For now, we each learn to take our moments with and away from our daughter. I love her with all my heart, but I don’t know how many times I can hear “mama!” when Mr. and Mrs. Potato head has a fall, lose their shoes and they’re sad (says my daughter).